Speech Therapy

A while back, we decided that it would be in the best interest of Zali and Zannah if we looked into Early Intervention. If you are not sure what this is, check out this link: http://www.dpw.state.pa.us/forchildren/earlyinterventionservices/index.htm

I don't say that because I don't want to explain it, I am mostly afraid that I am going to screw it up and give you wrong information for a program that I feel has been a Godsend to our family.

In October, a group of 3 women came to our home to "evaluate" the girls (this basically means that they played with them and took notes, at least that is what it meant to the girls). After about 2 hours, they discussed what they saw to be the issues and also our plan of attack. As we figured, both of the girls have a delay in their speech. We are not sure why (why is really not important) but Zali (34 months old) was at a 27 month level and Zannah (22 months old) was at a 10 month level.

I am going to be honest, to hear the numbers, it made me feel like a horrible mother. Like I had not done my part to educate them and ensure that they were where they should be. I was assured that this was not the case at all. It could be that neither girl felt that they needed to talk because everyone does it for them.

Anyway, I was told that I would receive a phone call within the next 7 days and therapy would start no later than 14 days after the evaluation. The therapist called and said that she would be at our home the following Monday and see if having the girls together was going to work or not.

Marilyn (their therapist) arrived 10 minutes early. Walked in and immediately the girls were intrigued. She brought her own toys, ipad and pens/paper... what could be wrong with that? They played for 2 hours. They were interested and participated the entire time. Marilyn was writing on a pad of paper when the girls would say something new. I sat on the couch and really watched how they interacted with Marilyn, it was different... refreshing. I am not used to watching them interact with anyone other than Bryan or myself so it was nice to see them in a different light.

When the 2 hours were up, Marilyn came back up to the couch to talk to me about what she felt. I was full on expecting her to say that she would rather have them separate so she could concentrate on them individually... that was not the case. She started with, "Mrs. Luhrs, I just have to say what a pleasure your girls have been. I was anticipating it being much more difficult to get them to work separately and I thought for sure there would be at least a struggle for my attention but I was very wrong." This made me really happy.

Since that first date, Marilyn has been to our home 4 times. The girls light up when they see her at the door. We both get on the floor with the girls and I watch her so that I know what I should be doing when it is just me here. Since the first visit, Zali has started to speak much more clearly so it is not just me that understands her (which is what I was hoping for). Zannah has started to try to say words instead of being silent and talking with her eyes.

This is everything that I have ever wanted for my girls and so much more. Watching them play on the floor with Marilyn and seeing the progress that they are making is complete bliss to me. Having Bryan understand what they are saying instead of me translating for him is a huge relief.

I am so thankful for this program, it has made a huge difference in my girls already and I feel so blessed to have the opportunity to use the service.

Today was a rough one...

... I suppose that is why I am still awake at 2am trying to catch up on PTA stuff and just generally trying to unwind a bit.

It has been awhile since I have written a blog, sorry about that. Something told me tonight that I needed to write something, anything really. Before I started to write, I noticed that my dear friend (who is pregnant with her 5th) had a difficult day a few weeks ago and blogged about it. I read it and immediately was able to sigh. This was my response to her blog:

Reading this both brought tears to my eyes and made me giggle a bit. Not in a mocking kind of way but in a "oh my YES, I am not the only one!" kind of a way. Having multiple young children is difficult... add in a pregnancy, it is next to impossible. Hormones, selective hearing and children with general ants-in-their-pants seems to build until something needs to give.

Tonight, I had a meltdown (which happens more often than I would like to admit) which included me in Zoe's room with huge construction trash bags, loading them full of her toys that she refused to clean up. I asked her to leave the room because 1)I did not want to torture her by making her watch all of her toys being taken away 2) I did not want to torture myself, listening to her cry and whine about how "unfair" I was being.

I have to admit, I was fuming... I could feel the warmth of my face and I could not deal with the older 2 children's blatant disrespect. I had been asking them both for two days to clean their rooms... and they would go up there but goof off. Too many times I have let it slide but this time, listening to them up on the 3rd floor squealing and giggling while goofing off... it did something to me. I walked up there and just started to yell.

I said what I had to say and then I told them they had 1 hour to clean their rooms. Whatever was not put in it's place would be put in a bag and given to a child that would appreciate it. An hour later, Quentin's room was clean but it actually looked like Zoe had made more of a mess.

I found myself this evening telling Bryan that I just can't to this anymore. I have given all that I have and I have failed. Bryan said to me, "how could you possibly have failed?" I feel like I failed my children, I failed my husband and I have failed myself...

I have since calmed down considerably... had some time to reflect... and reminded myself that I AM HUMAN. With all that we go through every day, it is completely normal and acceptable to have meltdowns from time to time. I am telling you, motherhood is not for the weak. There are many that are just not cut out for the job... but you, my dear, are one of the best examples of what being a mother is meant to be!

Kids are resilient. They bounce back quickly, far quicker than we do. Yes, they will remember words that were said or emotions that were let out for a little while but they will forever know how you love them so.
It is only going to get more interesting from here. Like I said, there are days (much like today) that I feel like I can not go on one more day... but then I go to all 5 of my babies while they are sleeping and I kiss them and say a silent prayer of protection over each one of them. I am reminded that I am so much stronger than I give myself credit for. I love you, thank you for sharing this because it is exactly what I needed to read at this exact moment!

I know that I have joked about writing a blog or column before... but I am now thinking that it is probably a good idea. Just like my friend's blog helped me to put things into perspective in my own life, if I could possibly help someone with that, why not? It is probably not going to be great and might even lack the wit that you are hoping for (okay, it will never lack sarcasm... let me just say that now). I don't know... let's give it a try, huh?